Ladies and gentlemen, the unthinkable has happened: I had a pregnant client.
As best I can tell she was three months along. Part of me felt like asking for an exact date, but I thought that might have been rude. After all, what business was it of mine? It's not like I was the father.
"How are you this evening?" I asked, because I knew I had to say something instead of just gawking her stomach. "Beautiful weather we're having."
"Fine, thank you. And just to answer your question, I'm almost four months along."
"Oh," I said, nodding my head. "I... I mean... That's wonderful. Congratulations."
At this point the questions were swimming through my mind like Michael Phelps at the Olympic games. Did the father abandon her? Did she go through IVF by herself? Again, I wanted to badly to say something, but decided against it. Part of what separates an escort from a street walker is a sense of gentility.
(Okay, perhaps "gentility" isn't the best word to use when having sex for money, but you get the idea. I'm not crude about it.)
"Would you like something to drink? Obviously I'm sticking to water, but if you'd prefer something else..."
"Water's fine."
In reality, I needed water -- if for no other reason that I could feel my face flushing red. For the first time ever in my career, I was truly nervous -- not a good thing. If this woman wanted a nervous man to go to bed with her, she would just try her luck at a bar.
We found our way into the bedroom soon enough. I stripped down to my boxers first, with the client sitting on the edge of the bed. After I laid her down on her back, I took my time undressing her, all the while glaring at her baby bump. It was then I noticed something: I wasn't nervous about the bump. In fact, I was turned on by it.
"Can I kiss your stomach?" I asked her.
"Yes."
I took the rest of her clothes off, starting with her shirt and pants, finishing with her bra and panties. She lay nude on the bed, nipples erect and stomach round. I kissed her on the mouth first, then finally kissed her abdomen. Once, however, wasn't enough.
I wanted to rub my hands over her stomach, kiss it again and again. Only after a bit of gentle prodding on her behalf did we finally have sex. Afterward, however, my hands found their way back to her baby bump. With her permission, I even pressed my ear against the abdomen, trying to see if I could hear anything.
"You've never been with a pregnant woman, have you?" the client asked.
"No, never. I'll admit I was a little shocked at first. But now, afterward... I mean, you look beautiful."
I truly meant it. Her breasts had swelled and her baby bump struck me as something of a miracle. A life growing inside of another human being? No, that can't be! But that's just what it was -- and being in such close proximity to her made it all so real.
Pressing my hand against that bump and knowing there was another life inside... I don't know if there are words for such a feeling. I was simply in awe. Alas, when 9 p.m. rolled around, I had to leave. Still, I know that I will remember this booking for the rest of my life.
The cab ride home was when the first pang of melancholy hit. Was she, the client, alone in the world? Did the father of her child leave her? Judging by her apartment I'd say she was well-off, but still. It seemed cruel to see something so beautiful as a pregnant woman only to think of her raising the child alone.
Will I have children of my own one day? Only time will tell. But after tonight it's safe to say that I would treat the mother of my child like a queen. And should I have a daughter, well, I'd probably love her more than life itself.
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